To my father
Updated: Aug 11, 2022
"I don't know whether my life has been a success or a failure. But not having any anxiety about becoming one instead of the other, and just taking things as they come along, I've had a lot of extra time to enjoy life."
You once said to me sometimes you feel as if you haven't accomplished enough in your life. While some people may say you haven't done enough, I am here to tell you otherwise.
Our society measures what we have accomplished by the career we have and how much money we make. I am yet to see on someone's gravestone "Here lays John, he made over 1 million dollars over his lifetime". We need to stop measuring success by jobs or dollar signs; success is different to everyone.
If you were to ask me what you have done with your life, I would say an awful lot. You have chosen a path less followed, a path that took you down many creative avenues, all the while supporting your children.
You worked a nine to five, but you are defined by what you did outside of that. I don't remember your job, I remember sitting in the audience as you sung in Fiddler On The Roof. I was beaming with pride! That is MY father I thought. My dad was in a Spanish band. My dad made crazy lights from motorcycle parts. My dad finished work early so he could be home every afternoon to spend it with us. My dad held our hands are we marched across a bridge, demanding an apology for the stolen land on which we live. My dad taught me to question the system, to think courageously and love openly.
Others may not see these accomplishments, but those small things are the ones that mean the most.
So I challenge you. I challenge everyone! Rethink what you have accomplished and what it really means. Don’t judge people solely by their career paths, instead by how they have made an impact on this planet. Time never stops ticking and when your time ends, know that those small gestures will be the ones you are remembered for.
Be kind, love often and never underestimate how much your small sacrifices may mean to someone you love.
"The fact that so many people find it impossible to imagine a meaningful life outside of work demonstrates the extent to which the work ethic has infected our minds...Workers come to be driven into our identity, portrayed as the only means for true self-fulfilment. With work tired so tightly into our identity, overcoming the work ethic will require us overcoming ourselves. "
Inventing the future by Nick Srnicek and Alex Williams
"I don't care too much for money. Money can't buy me love". I was four years old when that song came out. It's my first musical memory. That lyric, those two lines, has defined me ever since. I'm sure of it. Then came "All you need is love ". Just to reinforce the message. That message has been continuously carried to me by musicians both living and dead. I have travelled thousands of kilometres to be a part of live performances and have stayed home to be transported thousands of kilometres by musicians long dead who live on through their recordings. Music can change time and space. Alter consciousness. Open doors to other worlds. And as if, we are learning/relearning that everything, and I mean everything, every thought, every feeling, every idea are but differing vibratory frequencies of a greater universe, then music seems a perfect conduit for those frequencies to resonate within us and between us.
Love being the highest vibration. I guess I'm a child of the 60's.
Photography and Art by Lila Marvell.